There Should Be Balance!

by Marcia Davis-Dawkins | Jul 6, 2020 | Education

There Should Be Balance!

By Dr. Marcia Davis-Dawkins

Mother’s Day 2020 was not a normal one. It seems like it would be just another COVID-19 day, one that we were quarantined and would sit and be grateful for being alive and well unlike so many others who had succumbed to the dreaded pandemic. After all, Mother’s Day will be special for me whichever way I took it.

My daughter decided that she would surprise me and teach me to ride a bicycle! This sounded crazy especially since most people at my age can ride a bicycle, so the comments I usually get include, “How come you can’t ride a bicycle?” “You really can’t ride a bike?” “Were you just a scaredy-cat?”  Little did they know that not everyone is privileged to have access to a bicycle, and that was not priority when I was younger. Anyway, as I was learning I realized that there had to balance and that was the key to my being successful. I needed to face my fear of falling and learn how to balance on the bicycle!  Albert Einstein’s words rang in my ears as I tried the arduous task of balancing. He said that “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” I have taken cycling classes before at the gym and in fact, seen this quote on the wall of the cycling class but it didn’t matter then since the bikes were stationary and all I had to do was pedal to get going and the more I pedaled the faster I would go which would mean that I burnt more calories. This I had to put in place the hard way and truth be told, I learned the hard way because I tried to do things my way and let fear get in the way. Now I have a scar on my shin to show that I need balance in my life!

How many of us can remember being on a seesaw as a younger you? Well, I can especially since being on a seesaw was not much of challenge, so I mastered the art of see-sawing! Well, think about it if there is balance with the see-saw then both sides are on the same level. For those of you who are unsure what a seesaw is it a common playground equipment that features a board balanced in the center. One person sits on each end, and they take turns pushing their feet against the ground to lift their side into the air.

Taking care of ourselves includes having a balance so that we are not indulging in too much of anything. It means that we are listening to our bodies and ensuring that everything is aligned and feels good or okay. Many of us can tell for instance, when we have eaten too much and feeling stuffed. If we eat too much, then we will feel stuffed as well as gain too much weight. Then there is a spiral effect, if you gain too much weight then, there could be health issues like diabetes, or heart problems which then means that we don’t feel good about ourselves.

Setting boundaries is part of making things balance. If we are not balanced emotionally, then we are always down on ourselves. For instance, we might spend too much time watching the news, which tend to be sad and disturbing so watching the news can cause us to be depressed and unbalanced emotionally. We should therefore set emotional boundaries, so we don’t become too upset or even angry. We should be emotionally okay so much so that if we feel as if we need to talk to a therapist, then we should and avoid the misnomer that people will assume we are unstable if they are aware that we are seeing a therapist.

Balancing can also mean management of people we listen to or the types of people we surround ourselves with. Most times if we are surrounded by negatives people in our space then we tend to think just like they do which can become draining. Get rid of toxic people, who thrive on getting us down. Take time to breathe and feel save. Talk to friends and family who make you happy and confident. Sometimes our space has too much unnecessary noise and we find that people are saying things without even aware of facts versus false news. We should consider fact or just simply knowing the truth. Sometimes if we are uninformed, we can read to get informed and read from reliable sources so we can get in the know. Again, know when we are reading too much – stay balanced and know when to take a break and even say the right thing to others. Everyone’s mental health is not the same so we should balance and choose our words wisely.

Another important part of the balancing act in life is learning exercise often, so that we will stay healthy and even feel good about ourselves. This also ties in well with eating healthily so that we can no doubt feel happy because we won’t develop chronic diseases. Overall, we take care of self emotionally, spiritually, and physically. But in everything, don’t overdue things, don’t overeat, don’t over exercise, don’t over talk, and so on. As educators, we tend to take care of others, before we take care of ourselves. We must ensure that we are sending the correct messages to our children and believe it or not they will know when we are not taking care of ourselves. Help our students celebrate wins, especially when a skill is learned.  Sometimes we extend ourselves too far, too much time for family and none for self – set balances. If there are no balances, then we eventually get burnt out.  Be and feel valuable, affirm ourselves and feel confident! After all, our bodies should be our temples.

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Invisible Child

by Marcia Davis-Dawkins | Jun 2, 2020 | Education

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Invisible Child

By Dr. Marcia Davis-Dawkins

Recently I was asked by one of my friends, why I didn’t play a sport. Well, I calmly responded, “I didn’t get the opportunity to do so.” In my heart, I thought it would have ended there but it didn’t. He gasped and said, “Don’t tell me non-sense, in Jamaica, that is a poor excuse! There are so many sports in Jamaica and so many opportunities.” Needless to say, I was upset, but the conversation didn’t end so I gave him a brief version of the story. I was not convinced that he was satisfied with my reasoning but ah, well.

Long after our conversation, I was still a bit perturbed because I thought of how many times people including me, assumed that others have “so many opportunities”. The assumption is that we can be better with the presumed opportunities. Some educators assume that students cannot learn and they or their parents are not interested in learning. In the early stages of remote learning, it was evident that there were some teachers and parents who had resources to learn and assumed that every student had the same opportunities. There were students who didn’t have laptops or internet, for that matter, and those same students were not able to continue learning because of lack of resources. We must remember that not all students have the same opportunity.

As I reflect equal opportunity for students, I can’t help but to be reminded of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. This concept emphasizes the basic human needs: food, water, clothing, and shelter. Many families from low income neighbors are determined meet the needs of their families for survival, but schools may not be sensitive to the fact that many laptops and electronics are considered luxury items.

These students, who are overlooked and forgotten, I would consider an Invisible Student. Like myself when I was younger, the Invisible Student is the last to be considered. Their circumstances feel uncommon to a typical middle-class experience and many decisions made by educators are not in their favor. We as educators make decisions that affect the students negatively because we are making assumptions. For instance, a typical assumption is that they are troublemakers who can’t or refuse to learn. We make assumptions that some students or even colleagues are of less value than others and therefore, we treat them differently. It saddens me that we say ALL students are equal and yet we don’t treat them as such. Are we just saying things and not acting on the words?

We must realize that when students or people in general are hurting, they will yell. When the yells are not hurt, they start screaming. After the screams are not heard, they will act out because they feel frustrated. It was Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., who once said, “A riot is the voice of the unheard.” Obviously, students will yell because they feel they are not being heard. The Invisible Students want to be seen and heard. Do we take time to listen to them?

Most times, they do have underlined issues why they act out. We are failing them by not taking the time to listen to them.

Sometimes it seems as if we as educators are not compassionate, we tend to scream at our students too, and expect them to feel special and work to their full potential. Students are individuals who deserve respect. Unless we acknowledge our students’ hurt and realize that they have a purpose, we probably won’t make a marked difference in their lives. Are we playing the role of educators and helping the students reach their goals? We might not be validating our students’ emotions or make them feel as if they have a voice. Dare I say, we might be stepping on their progress because we disregard that they are visible? At times we are simply passive observers and take out our frustrations on the students. Life for us can be so unfair and painful, that we too label students and colleagues negatively and have the nerve to say they are ANGRY, without knowing their stories – we prejudge them!

It is a fact that if we treat people less than they are worth, then eventually we will be treated badly as well – karma as it is known. Let us make an effort to see others as equal or even special. Help to motivate and encourage our students to feel better about themselves. Let us examine ourselves and see if we are stifling our students or colleagues. Like Maya Angelou once said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Help students feel visible! Let’s make a difference as educators and I feel hopeful that we can send positive energies in our students’ spaces since we are who we think! We can release hopelessness and/or anger in our students. As the “Starfish” story states, at the end, “no we can’t save every Starfish” but “It makes a difference” to those who you do reach and help and send on to greater heights. Encourage equity among your colleagues and students. Try to make a difference to ALL students, even the invisible ones.

 

https://youtu.be/bck-Pm-VDpk   The Starfish Story   I invite you to watch this video and be inspired

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Dangerous Disturbances

by Marcia Davis-Dawkins | Apr 10, 2020 | Education

Dangerous Disturbances

By Dr. Marcia Davis-Dawkins

Music has always been a source of inspiration, a time of reflection and motivation and I recently heard a song during the dreaded COVID-19 pandemic that we faced and I thought of how disturbed this virus had made us.  The song, titled “Dangerous Disturbances”, by a Jamaican Reggae group called Chalice, refers to reggae taking over the world and I thought how interesting that it is indeed a shock how the human coronavirus has literally taken over the world.

Because of this virus, everything has come to a halt. Well carved out plans, which were put in place months and years ago, are disturbed. Plans that have disturbed our peace of mind and sent us scurrying and wondering what next. This dangerous, disease came and disturbed us in so many ways.  It brought about scarcity of common household items including paper products, cleaning items, disinfectants and variants of food.

Teachers are collaborating and gathering ways of teaching from home. Who would have thought that this was possible for teachers, especially for elementary teachers, to be working from home? What a challenge this has been.  The same invisible disease has incited fear in so many of us in us on a global scale. Well, new things are happening and 2020 – a leap year too, has been disturbed in many ways. With teachers working from home, parents are forced to become teachers and educate their children.

It is sad realize that some students will not get the support from some parents and we wonder how they are surviving – we know that there are students who definitely need teachers to encourage and support them. There are students who are desperately seeking love, kindness, wisdom and understanding from many of their mentors and may not receive. We often think of those students who have stopped learning and are distracted by various entities within their home environments and wish they could be in the school setting. For some, school is a part of their regular schedule and may even comfort them.

Students who may have been preparing to take state tests or final exams have plans that have been disturbed. These exams would have determined which student would be promoted to the next level of schooling or the next level in life. Suddenly, these plans are simply wiped out.

As educators, we are grateful for technology that is available. This technology gives us opportunities to encourage learning, as well as to teach virtually. I recently saw that one person even referred to this form of teaching as “quaran-teaching”. To top it off, there is a definition that states “teachers scrambling to prepare for digital learning with zero training, funding, or assistance, for an undisclosed amount of time, for parents who have an equal amount of preparation.”

For whatever it is worth, I hope that this dangerous disturbance is bringing, a sense of connectivity and most of all love in the family. Families that are isolated and quarantined are often too busy to even talk to each other have finally received the chance to truly get to know one another in this time of crisis.  Dangerous disturbances cause us to pause and reflect on our lives and to think of those around us. Interestingly, the disturbance didn’t affect a certain, race, color, creed or country – everyone was disturbed!

Students and teachers who are confined in their homes and fearful and tend to feel hopeless, but I certainly will not encourage it. There is a sense of hope and love among each other. The educators are hoping that even though we are not connected physically, there will always be a way to connect virtually; there will always be a way to put our hearts in it.  As the late Country and Western singer Kenny Rogers, would say, “When we put our hearts in it, it can take us anywhere, and who’s to say that we can’t make it, it’s the same dream that we share.”

There are many questions we may have, but in the end, we will be drawn closer to each other and assist our neighbors, families. So many losses, so many broken promises, so many broken plans – plans that are simply wiped out (disturbed) because of the pandemic. Amidst our challenges, though seemingly disturbing, is a hope that we, as educators, can send wonderful messages of encouragement to our friends, families and students. Hopefully we will find the good in the disturbance.

Even though there are fears, fears of not knowing enough for an exam, fear of what is going happen to students, or just fear of the unknown, we can see that there is a silver lining behind the dark cloud. This disturbance is giving us a chance to be attentive to our way of life, our way of teaching and the hope is that; our students’ families are able to get to know their family members again through bonding and talking to each other. They can read, play, be creative and problem solve together. The idea is there is a sense of support and renewal in the family. Most of all, the dangerous disturbances usually help to discover and reveal the true us. Through the educators collaborating, there is a new sense of community, creativity and shared responsibility. We are all in this thing together and we will work things out. We are in solidarity!

Fear